Everybody
knows how to raise a child, except the people who have them.
P.J. O’Rourke.
The
above saying holds true, and the evidence is us – “The Parents”. It is true
only because we know preaching is easier than following. Perhaps, it takes
courage to raise children or maybe not. Parenting is fun when parents become
children and grow simultaneously together. A little difficult task, but not an
impossible one as everything depends on upbringing.
Parenting,
traces its birth from marriage. Concerning on each other’s needs, developing a
sense of acceptance, patience quotient, and all these qualities leads to a
strong foundation to parenting. Woman sees her first child in her husband. When
the actual parenting starts she sees no difference except the height and
weight. Parenting is seen as a duty, and people tend to sacrifice many things
which are actually not required. For example, the “Husband-Wife” factor
disappears at the cost of parenting.
The
stages of life have been defined and categorized into four stages. Infancy,
Childhood, Adolescence and Adulthood. Parenting is needed in all these stages
where everyone wants to be a perfect and an ideal parent, but unfortunately no
one achieves that in the entire life time. Learning is a continuous process and
mastering the same would require some effort. Here are few things that can take
parenting to a better level.
Childhood
is the building block upon which the later stages will be built. Hence stop
uttering NO to your kid, because that creates bitterness and at the same time an
eagerness to know about. Let them explore each and everything by themselves, make
them realize what is important and what is not or the priorities; once this is
mastered then everything else falls in place. Educate your children about
self-control, to live with pride, respect ideals which takes their lives to
greatest heights.
Adolescence
stage, a bit difficult stage in upbringing; where they become independent. Here
one has to be a strong parent besides being a friend. At the same time step
aside and just be a simple listener, a good friend to confide, share your views
but do not force your opinions. Nowadays kids outsmart the parents and they
just need someone to be with and not on them. This goes vice-versa as well,
when children are grown enough to educate others, they start to teach their
parents; which most of the parents cannot accept, because parents have their
own ideology and they refuse to change. As this goes either ways, both children
and parent should draw a demarcation between the relations to keep them alive
forever and respect each other’s ethics.
There
should be a feel-good factor at home, when a situation goes haywire with the
parents, it is advisable to control in a peaceful manner rather being violent
or egoistic. This is how you model your children a valuable lesson in patience,
understanding and solving a conflict. Ultimately, the psychology matters; how
well the situation ended, positive approach leaves a satisfaction whereas the
negative one goes with a scar.
Give
your child a walker when trying to walk, give them feathers when they want to
fly, but do not snatch their feathers just because you are afraid of your child
getting hurt; because it is impossible to protect them from disappointment at
all stages of life. Ample communication, tons of trust, loads of love are the
assets of healthy parenting. The moment children and parent relation turns
trustworthy, then it is impossible to break the bond at any cost.
To
be in your children’s memories tomorrow, it is very important to be in their
lives today. As Learning knows no limit – keep
learning and Happy Parenting!!!
By a Learning Parent,
Anitha S